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- When Mr. T folds his arms, the U.S. Terror Alert Level is raised to gold.
- Mr. T invented orphans.
- If you rearrange the letters in Mr. T, he’ll break you.
- Mr. T invented the X-Ray, the G-String, the R-Rating and Jay-Z after a late-night drunken bender briefly caused him to forget which letter he was.
- Mr. T toasts his bread with a flamethrower and pities any fool who uses a toaster.