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- As a result of a giant squid or hobgoblin bite, the lymph nodes will first start to crawl with maggots as the anus also begin to emit music by vibrating, until the skeletal system has shattered into dust. Sadly, there is no known cure
- Unprotected sex with a crocodile will cause the blood to begin to sprout plant life and be infested with burnt orange buboes. The only known cure is to eat of a rare and precious fruit, then pray as the disease runs its course
- Licking monsters will cause the lymph nodes to start to turn bluish and eventually melt, then the underarms will slowly become a gelatinous amber slime. The only known cure is to pray as the disease runs its course
- Angering monsters will cause the toes to start to emit such a foul stench that anyone in range (including the victim) will vomit constantly and ooze with white pus. The only known cure is to eat of a rare and precious fruit
- Bathing in certain waters will cause the scalp to begin to slowly become a gelatinous green slime. The only known cure is to bathe in the urine of a wight